Pleasure is timeless.
Pleasure is the gratification of the senses or of the mind; agreeable sensations or emotions; the excitement, relish or happiness produced by enjoyment or the expectation of good.
Name: Lisa
Age: 56
I never imagined that I would find myself in my 50s being more sexually active than when in my 20s. I love my body and celebrate pleasure in its different shapes and forms in my 56 year-old temple. I test for STIs and HIV on a regular basis because my sexual health is important to me. Take it from me, sex never gets old!
Name: Mark
Age: 76
Pleasure and play are still an important part of my life at 76. While I may have slowed down a bit over the years as a result of some physical issues, I still love to play and definitely seek pleasure. Taking care of myself and my partners around HIV and STIs allows me to play responsibly because sex never gets old!
Name: Charles & Janice
Age: 66 & 56
After being friends for several years we decided to make it official and start dating. Initially, we were a bit anxious because we had both dated lots of individuals over the years and had never been tested for STIs and HIV. We agreed to test for STIs and HIV so that we could play and explore pleasure and that was the best decision for our relationship. Now we are ready to roll because sex never gets old!
Name: Ray & Claire
Age: 63 & 64
We lucked out finding each other on a dating site for older adults. Our chemistry is magical. We are enjoying taking our time getting to know each other and discovering what brings us pleasure. A key part of exploring what brings us pleasure means that we prioritize testing for STIs and HIV. We are looking forward to what comes next because sex never gets old!
What does Pleasure mean to you?
HANC surveyed adults 50 years of age and older to gain their insight. The following quotes are direct, unedited responses from individuals who responded to the survey.
Guilt-free: U+U, PrEP/PEP. The wisdom to explore what turns on me and my partners.
(Male, White, Age Range: 61-71)
Embracing my body as a women living with HIV.
(Female, Puerto Rican, Age Range: 50-60)
Emotional stimulation and patience around mobility issues.
(Female, Black, Age Range: 50+)
It means that I get to enjoy my body as younger people do with no judgement.
(Male, Black, Age Range: 50-60)
A LOT! Relieves tension.
(African American, Age Range: 61-71)
It means being able to enjoy it to the fullest extent that my life circumstances allow. This includes reading, gaining knowledge, self-pleasure, sexual relationships with people I consent to, and having fun on social media.
(Heterosexual Woman, Latina, Age Range: 50-60)
As an older adult, sexual pleasure must still include discussions around testing, consent and comfort -- especially as my needs have changed as a result of menopause.
(Female, White, Age Range: 50-60)
I simply must insist that we both climax or there's no point in getting started.
(Female, Black, Age Range: 61-71)
Being able to have guilt-free sex with other adults of my choosing.
(Male, White, Age Range: 50-60)
Pleasure
Pleasure from sex doesn’t necessarily change as we age. Sexual pleasure is not a young person’s privilege—it’s a lifelong right and source of joy. Pleasure can come from sexual activity, intimacy, and social engagement. Sexual activity remains important for many older adults. Research has shown it contributes to a better quality of life and well-being. 73% of adults aged 57–64 are sexually active, 53% of adults aged 65–74, and 26% of adults aged 75–851. 74% of partnered older adults report being satisfied with their sex life1.
Sexual pleasure evolves with many older adults reporting greater confidence, communication skills, and comfort with their bodies and desires. Non-penetrative touch, kissing, massage, oral sex, and cuddling are equally (or more) pleasurable for many. Others find kinks and other communities to satisfy their sexual desires. One study demonstrated adapting sexual practices—rather than abandoning them—can support sustained or enhanced pleasure as people age2.
Desire doesn’t always fade—but what brings satisfaction may shift. Pleasure is still very possible with adjustments and openness.
Find your pleasure. Talk with your partner(s) and your provider to address the changing landscape of your sex life. Sex doesn’t get old. Pleasure is forever.
1Lindau, S. T., Schumm, L. P., Laumann, E. O., Levinson, W., O’Muircheartaigh, C., & Waite, L. J. (2007). A study of sexuality and health among older adults in the United States. New England Journal of Medicine, 357(8), 762–774. https://doi.org/10.1056/NEJMoa067423
2Thomas HN, Hamm M, Hess R, Thurston RC. Changes in sexual function among midlife women: "I'm older… and I'm wiser". Menopause (New York, N.Y.). 2018 Mar;25(3):286-292. DOI: 10.1097/gme.0000000000000988. PMID: 29088016; PMCID: PMC5821528.
Explore the Sexual Health Spectrum
Sexual Wellness
An important state of physical, emotional, and social well-being related to sexuality focused on the possibility of engaging in pleasurable experiences throughout the human lifespan.
Disclaimer
Images feature models for illustrative purposes only. Stories are fictionalized and not based on actual people or events. Any resemblance is purely coincidental.